Mar 12, 2012
Post-Traumatic Descriptive Disorder
In my job, there are certain phrases, like "strong demand is expected," that I use on such a consistent basis that I sometimes resort to desperate measures in order to maintain the illusion of my originality. Today, I described the demand that we were expecting as frantic. Compelling, right? My boss told me to pick a "less traumatic" word. Touche.
Mar 9, 2012
What Makes Me Think My Office Is Designed to Prevent Pregnancy
They post the most interesting announcements directly above the microwaves, which are exactly womb-high.
Mar 8, 2012
I Think We Should Fight.
Last night, I finally finished the John Grisham nonfiction book The Innocent Man, which has been sending me off to bed with despair for the atrocities that occur in America's police stations, courtrooms, and prisons. Just when I'd all but entirely lost faith in humanity and our legal system, things started turning around for Ron Williamson and Dennis Fritz, thanks to the efforts of some honest and upstanding citizens (they do exist!).
Ultimately, the book left me with two realizations.
1. In the face of overwhelming adversity and what seems like a hopelessly unjust situation, even one person struggling for what's right can make a difference. It is imperative that we fight for freedom, whether it is our own, or someone else's, even if it seems futile. And it is even more imperative that we continue to fight, until we have realized our goal. There will always be injustice and hatred and pain, but that doesn't mean we should accept it. I think that the most important thing we can do with our lives is to fight.
2. John Grisham is not only one of the two popular writers I adore, but he is also a good looking man.
Ultimately, the book left me with two realizations.
1. In the face of overwhelming adversity and what seems like a hopelessly unjust situation, even one person struggling for what's right can make a difference. It is imperative that we fight for freedom, whether it is our own, or someone else's, even if it seems futile. And it is even more imperative that we continue to fight, until we have realized our goal. There will always be injustice and hatred and pain, but that doesn't mean we should accept it. I think that the most important thing we can do with our lives is to fight.
2. John Grisham is not only one of the two popular writers I adore, but he is also a good looking man.
Mar 5, 2012
An Inappropriate Inequity
We all know that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. But it's one of life's lesser-known inequities that inappropriate touching is in the beauty of the toucher.
So gentlemen , before touching a lady in any way, please verify that she finds you attractive, charming, or at least endearing. Lest she cries creep.
P.S. I am hereby claiming all rights to the phrase "Lest she cries creep."
So gentlemen , before touching a lady in any way, please verify that she finds you attractive, charming, or at least endearing. Lest she cries creep.
P.S. I am hereby claiming all rights to the phrase "Lest she cries creep."
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