May 27, 2011

Hearts Don't Burst

"To lead a life in which we are inspired and can inspire others, our hearts have to be alive; they have to be filled with passion and enthusiasm. To achieve that, we need the courage to live true to ourselves. Rather than borrowing from or imitating others, we need the conviction to be able to think for ourselves and to take action out of our own sense of responsibility." - Daisaku Ikeda

I've been confronting some pretty daunting obstacles lately. Challenges which I've avoided for years through a variety of destructive, life-negating techniques. In Buddhism, the concept of fundamental darkness refers to the deep-seated human delusions that keep us from seeing the unlimited potential for beauty and truth and happiness that exists within each and every living being. The lies we have learned to believe. I'm not talented enough to pursue that career. My worth depends on how attractive, accomplished, or rich I am. I can't.

In the course of my life, I've cultivated a great many false beliefs about myself. These delusions are deep-seated and manifest themselves in many different, often subtle ways. Powerful emotional responses fueled by compulsive fear-based thinking. These reactions are not only life-negating, but self-negating. Which, ultimately, is the same thing.

I am on a mission to realize my true self. Therein, I believe, will I find my highest purpose. To be myself fully and with conviction, I aim to enrich the world in my own unique and valuable way. And in doing so, to be able to inspire others to do the same -- find their meaning in the precious individuality of their being.

To inspire. From the Latin, meaning "to breathe into." In my art, it has always been my goal to inspire others, to touch their hearts and fill them with the intense vitality of human emotions and the determination to pursue victory. What I've not realized until recently, is that this is also the goal of my life itself. And the way to victory is in transforming my mind and my spirit ... to breathe life into my heart until it is so full I think it will burst. This is a state of abundance. This is the passion I feel so blessed to experience. This is the indestructible joy I am seeking, and which I will realize through persistent effort and a renewed commitment to honor and be myself. Just as I am.

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